ABOUT

ORIGIN OF THE NAME

My real name is Matthew Christopher Hightshoe.  I go by the stage name D4Disgruntled. The name has two origins I guess. The first being based on the idea that most creative people are disgruntled or have been disgruntled at some point in their lives. The overall name came about as a result of the artist  falling in love with the movie "V for Vendetta". Presto, he came up with "D for Disgruntled". However, it seemed to read better graphically when the number "4" was substituted for the word "for". Also, when truncating it to just "D4D" for some time, the artist had fun with people's reaction to it.

In the urban dictionary, "D4D" stands for something sexual - down for dick. Not knowing this originally, when the artist found out what this meant, he was quite humored as he happens to be gay himself. So technically, he IS "down for dick". It's okay to laugh uncomfortably now.

This explained why for some time the artist was unable to get certain "handles" on facebook and instagram that used "d4d" in the larger handle name. Eventually he was able to find handles that worked allowing him to use the "d4d".

ABOUT MY CREATIONS

My art, writings and music is a reflection of my perceptions, observations and anecdotal experiences of the world around me. I would describe my work as being the result of life chewing me up and spitting me back out. I present my viewpoints through humorously demented and twisted visuals that satirize, editorialize and criticize the bizzarro reality I am trapped in.

Be warned, my works are not to popular norms or trends. They will offend some but then again, someone, somewhere, will get offended by something at some point. I am not out to appease the masses. By presenting the world in an even more absurd and twisted manner than it currently is in reality, hopefully people will see through the BS that they are drowning in, and finally take a stand and fight back to restore a sane normalcy.

Being different makes me a target for haters. I don;t care. if you like my work great, if not, fuck off and move on. Just like my quote states "I am not easily offended, yet, I easily offend everyone else".

MY BACKSTORY

I am a white, man of german-irish decent originally from Indiana, otherwise known as a "drunk nazi that was corn fed on the farm" or simply a "Hoosier". However, I am not from a small town or a farm as I was born and raised in Indianapolis, the capital city of Indiana. Having a shaved head (to hide my baldness) doesn't help being seen as a skinhead or white supremist. Hey, I will take any notoriety I can get these days to stay relevant.

Before  it became cool, acceptable, and fashionable, I was the product of a baby boomer lesbian couple upbringing in the 1980s. One of the lesbians is my birth mother. I was an accident when she was 19 (more commonly known as a bastard child). She decided to keep me alive instead of being ripped apart inside the womb and sucked out by a mini vacuum cleaner.

However, I would grow up suffering extreme nearsightedness my whole life and forcing me to wear glasses with lenses as thick as coke bottle bottoms. This might have led to why I over analyze everything in life which would annoy so many people around me. I did wear contacts during the day since the age of 5 but stopped at age 30. They irritated the hell out my eyes and I looked like I was having a seizure from my eyes blinking constantly. I switched back to glasses with thick lenses from that point forward and was at one point told I looked like Dr. Cyclops from some old B-Movies from the 1940s. This would explain why I had low self esteem about my self image. Despite being in relatively good shape, my glasses were a huge detractor for those who might have wanted to date me.

My mother would go on to be a lesbian several years later and has been with the same partner since I was 5 years old. I would eventually come out as gay myself during college and continue a life in gay culture. That part of my life is better saved for my memoirs. Just know that I suffered addiction with drugs, alcohol and sex in my younger adult life, oh hell, into my later adult life as well. The things I did in my youth...will be discussed in my memoirs (and maybe revealed in some of my art and stories).

Growing up, I escaped into movies, horror and sci-fi were my favorite. I would buy publications that talked about the making of many of the movies I loved (Fangoria, Starlog, Cinefantastique, Cinefex). Additionally, I would read comics, play video games, and draw a lot. I also built boats, ocean liners and office buildings out of paper. Eventually I would get to use more traditional materials in my teen years to make architectural miniatures and get model kits. Toy wise I was a Transformer and G.I. Joe kinda guy. Although I always wanted the Easy Bake Oven and the Barbie Dream House or at least the 3 story apartment. I did have a doll house that I built from a kit and had the furniture for.  But I would pretend there were earthquakes and make all the furniture fall over.

In 1988, my family moved to Silver Spring, Maryland where I attended 8th grade to 12 grade. I graduated from Springbrook High School in 1993. During my adolescent years, I became a fan of film music, architecture and movie making. This prompted my desire to study filmmaking, architecture and music composition. My parents supported my interests and would do what they could to provide me the tools and resources to be an artist and composer such as a synthesizer, a drafting table, pen, inks, markers, paper, and other supplies to build architectural models. I still have a lot of the art and music I created back then in my storage.

Eventually, I started designing my own worlds as well as coming up with my own versions of anime-like battle tech robots as I was a fan of Akira and Robotech. I even tried my hand in caricatures of celebrities and famous public figures as I was also into MAD and CRACKED magazines at that time.

From 1994 to 1999 I attended and graduated from Indiana University in Bloomington, Indiana. While there, I studied Fina Art from for which I received a Bachelor of Arts Degree, I took a variety of other courses that helped give me pretty rounded and foundational education for the areas I would eventually pursue after graduation. These included Opera and Theatre Scene Design, Music Theory and Composition, Graphic Design, Urban Legends, Greek Mythology in Art, Weight Lifting, and Critical Thinking.

I also continued my work life in video stores and the local cinema until the advent of DVDs. Then I was getting a new form of filmmaking education from the commentary tracks. Hearing not just the directors talk but the production designers and the composers were getting in on the commentary action. Also, the internet exploded and I suddenly hd additional access to even more content regarding the making of films, film music, computer animation, etc. This kept my interest in filmmaking, film music and wanting to be a production designer / concept artis t alive despite not having the proper resources to create content that would help me get into those fields.

Sadly, after college, my career ventured into Graphic Design and Web Design in order to make a living. I made multiple attempts over the years freelancing on the side trying to break into the industry creating concept art and storyboards for other aspiring filmmaker's script pitch decks, but that was to no avail. These projects would always hit a dead end at some point and never became anything and ended up getting shelved. I started to jokingly call myself the "professional shelver".

After years of disappointment after disappointment I was becoming disgruntled.

I gave up for a while. I made a return in 2016 by forming my own independent low cost video production and post-production services as a means of also networking and doing work for people who may have known people who may have known the person I wanted to get in contact with. While this venture was more successful as it managed to open some doors for networking, it still was not bringing in enough income. Sadly, the Covid Pandemic and ensuing lockdowns completely destroyed my business.

As my friend Scott Schirmer told me, "I am like a weed that doesn't give up. No matter how many times I get trampled on or destroyed, I manage to find a new spot to pop up from".

During the lockdowns, I turned inward and focused on my own artistic creations. I took the time to start re-inventing myself, advancing his skill sets in digital painting and illustration, as well as investing in obtaining more professional resources and tools for my music production efforts. I managed to become the Music Assistant to film Composer Richard Band in which has led me to compose additional music on several movies for which Richard was the principal composer. Additionally, I have been releasing my own music albums which are available on this site.

My albums are categorized as "Concept Soundtrack Albums". Some tell a story of their own in which I write the story and then compose music inspired by the story.  Each track title acts like a Chapter Title in the story. My other albums are Re-Score Albums in which I pick a genre movie (horror or sci-fi) and re-score it as though I was originally hired to score it. I use not of the original material in the scores that exist in the movie. It is all my material.

Regarding my writing side. I never thought I had that capability. For years I came up with outlines that never truly got finished, some even had doodles and sketches of comic book pages as they were intended to be comic books or graphic novels. Not until I did a few of my "concept soundtrack albums"  where I had to write the story otu first before composing any music to it did I realize I might have the ability. I mean, I am a Visual Storyteller and I tell stories with my music so it only seemed natural that I could also write.

So I dusted off my old stories that have sat in boxes for a decade and am bringing them to fruition along with new stories as well. Expect to see forthcoming anthology comic books & graphic novels, illustrated novels & coffee table picture books, as well as an editorial cartoon magazine in the vane of MAD and CRACKED magazine. All will be available through this website.